Let Not A Straw Man Stand

Here’s a practically speaking rhetorical question: do you all remember when that professional football player knelt during the national anthem and a bunch of people- including very high ranking members of our federal government who should have better things to do with each and every single day they hold office- made a really big deal about it? And then when said football player- and a number of other people- provided very eloquent explanations for his action, the aforementioned big deal makers responded by saying, um, as I recall, nothing much at all? For a very long time? Except to maybe gloat a little about how the football player got fired, and then nothing again when he still got a huge athletic shoe ad campaign deal?
     Except for, and let us not forget, those brave souls who threw away their shoes in protest. Don’t ever forget those shoeless patriots who love their country and freedom so much that they absolutely cannot abide dissenters. Once these morally righteous watchdogs let people get away with kneeling during the anthem, it’s a pretty small step to illegal bribery, treason, and election fraud, and we all know how intolerant they are of that kind of behavior.
     America First, and all that.
     Anyway, friends and neighbors, I can understand why, after so much time has passed (particularly from a news cycle point of view), you might find yourself asking why I’m bringing this up at all. Well I’m glad yourself asked, because I can’t wait to tell you! See, recently, as I’m sure you’re aware, George H.W. Bush, one time- and one term- President of the United States died. As is customary, a lot of notable politicians showed up to pay their disparate respects. This includes not only our current POTUS (Pretty Obviously Traitorous and Unctuous Scumbag (coming up with these for months now, non stop)), who apparently failed to cover his heart with his hand during the National Anthem (but totally did stand up), but also former Senator and Pepsi Cola spokesman Bob Dole, who managed to get up from his wheelchair to salute the deceased former Presidents’ casket.
     And there, finally, after nearly half a page and yet still somehow without any real and obvious connection, I’ve brought up the two things that have spurred me on to write this piece: a kneeling professional athlete and a standing elderly senator. Now, on the surface the two seem to have so little in common that you may be on the precipice of accusing me of bad writing, but hear me out, I beg you.
     Well, maybe not beg exactly, but attempt instead to entice you with tantalizingly leading sentences.
     Although I will admit one thing to you right off the bat, my attentive and intelligent reader: these two things do in fact have nothing in common.
     Which is exactly why we’re here today. You see, recently I was unfortunate enough to witness one of those internet occurrences known as a “meme”, wherein it was stated that if this elderly man can stand up to salute a dead former president, than anyone else should be able to stand for the national anthem. When I witnessed this obvious and desperately unreasonable argument, I was immediately reminded of the phrase “Straw Man.”
     I imagine most of the people reading this are well aware that “straw man” is a term used to describe an intentionally misleading argument that puts the original statement - in this case a peaceful protest made by a person in a highly publicized position- in a misleading light, so that said statement can be easier to demean and defeat.
      In other words, it’s a bunch of nonsense made up by people who would rather feel righteous than actually be right.
     In this case, we are expected to believe that the afore alluded to football playing gentleman’s actions were a direct and audacious attack on our country’s ideals and moral foundations, instead of a simple and quiet request for decency, as so many peaceful protests have been from people who are tired of seeing their countrymen murdered without cause by people who are supposed to protect them. Somehow, this is meant to be seen as an act of cowardice when compared to the actions of the former Senator and Viagra spokesman, who stood up to salute the former president.
     Now let me take just a minute here to say that I in no way intend to demean the actions of Senator Dole. The amount of effort and respect he showed is commendable, and if there is an afterlife, I’m sure President Bush is choosing to focus on this display of respect instead of the actions of our current POTUS ( Pretentious Overblown and Toweringly Unaware Stooge).
     Rather, my aim is simply to point out that connecting events like these, which in reality have nothing in common, at best reminds some people that kneeling and standing are in fact two different things.  It does not, it turns out, make any kind of valid moral or political statement. A straw man can be positioned however one pleases, but it will never say anything of substance to anyone really paying attention.
-John