Declaration Day 2019

     It's once again that time, friends and neighbors! The music in all the stores is more bell-centric and terrible, coffee places are adding pumpkin spice and gingerbread to everything, and people get unreasonably offended if one fails to end a conversation  by acknowledging their specific holiday. As the annual celebrations reach their fever pitch zenith, I want to take a moment and wish every one a happy and beneficial Declaration Day. As some of you know, Declaration Day is a relatively new and as yet very unknown holiday created by myself and observed by great and good people. For those of you who are not already familiar, I've laid out the meaning and spirit of the holiday below.
     For those of you who are familiar already, I've updated things a little for modern convenience, so feel free to refresh yourselves. Enjoy:

     It is hereby proposed that, instead of trying to reclaim an existing holiday, most of which have been either destroyed by consumerism and greed or ruined by more accurate accounts of history, we make up a new one, which takes place on the Twelfth of December. This day shall be known as Declaration Day, and shall work thusly:
     There are no gifts, no big meals, no dying plants to decorate or terrible songs to sing. There is no affiliated religion or deity to worship (though I'd be willing to listen to some prayers, as long as they are juicy), and there are no special outfits. All you must do to participate is tell one, just one, person you care about a real, honest thing. No sugar coating either; just plain simple truth.
     And it can't be something easy, like telling a significant other "I love you", or telling a best friend they are really important to you. Tell them something you wouldn't normally tell them.
     Now, just a couple of rules, which I get to make, because I invented the holiday (hence the earlier implication that prayers be sent to me.)
     1) This truth may not be conveyed via any medium that does not allow for immediate response. The point of this holiday is accurate, honest, real communication, and I have learned over the years that removing the possibility of response often instills crudity and meanness. So in order to maintain genuine sincerity and vulnerability, face to face is best. An actual phone call or video chat is permitted if circumstances require it. Text communication is henceforth deemed acceptable, however all messages must be re-read twice and closely scrutinized for potential misunderstanding.
     2) Any person to whom a truth is delivered is automatically allowed to dispense a truth in return. So, if your decision is to finally tell that coworker they should stop wearing open toed shoes, they will be allowed to tell you that everyone knows you pick your nose and hide the findings under your desk like a gross gross goblin, provided both statements are true. This provision is in place not to keep one from expressing an honest opinion, but only to maintain balance. No one wants some dummy just walking around telling people what's wrong with them. Also, bear in mind, if you decide to only convey the, let's say, unkind thoughts in your head, people are going to notice, and eventually you'll end up with less people in your life to complain about than you might want, with only your misery for company.
     So try not to be a jerk about it. Just take a little brain power away from who on your gift list would like that neat-o tea kettle (everyone who wants one has one already), try not to think about what to wear to the office holiday party (skip it. Just skip it; who even cares?) and let your mind come up with something you can tell someone that really, really matters. Anything, for anyone, as long as it's not a commercial for diamonds or toys.
     Good luck with it, and as the creator of Declaration Day, I shall kick things off with something for all of you:
     This was a crazy, bonkers year for me on a personal level, and the first half in particular broke me bad. But I'm better, so much better, now than I was even before, and there is no way I would've made it back without the people in my life who care for me. I came of out of all of this with more appreciation than ever for what people can do for each other, a truth that can be easy to forget when one finds themselves feeling alone and abandoned. Some of you may not even realize you helped. But you did, and to you, for you, I am forever grateful. Thank you.
-John